Do you keep making the same mistakes? Are you worried about trying something new? Scared you’ll fail? Feel like there is something holding you back from doing the things that really make you happy? Do you feel stuck? Are you concerned that a good time will run out or that you won’t have enough money later on? Are you concerned about things happening in the future and fear that you won’t know how to manage the situation? Are you noticing that you are editing what you say or feeling a lack of confidence in yourself? You could have an issue with trust. Read on.
Trust starts at conception and with our caregivers as we are reliant on them to provide our needs. Over time, we learn to ask for things that we need and discover that the world is a safe place where we can love and trust others and a place where if we have a need or an issue, that we can resolve this with help from those around us. As we grow, we begin to test things out and try things to build trust in ourselves and others. This process of testing is really prominent in the adolescent stage where we are really forming our own identity, separate from others. If we make good choices and we ask for something and are given what we need (even if we ask for something other than we need but are given the thing we need), we learn to trust ourselves and those around us. However, there are many different things that can happen that can disrupt that level of trust in ourselves and in others; starting with our caregivers or early relationships such as neglect, abuse, loss, harsh discipline or punishment, religion (yes I totally said religion) but also with trust in ourselves as we may have made some mistakes that had quite devastating consequences, or we may not have been able to make mistakes with an over-protecting parent. I am yet to find another person who hasn’t had an issue with trust (either in themselves or trusting others) come up in some time in their lives. And I am not immune to this either!! For this reason, within the Energy Clearing work that I do with people, we briefly re-visit the past as it is here where our beliefs have developed and a lack of trust begins as once these beliefs are formed, they get reinforced throughout our lives.
I have worked a lot around trust in my personal life as well as my professional life so feel like I have so much to say about this topic (far more than I can possibly say in just one post!). Much of my counselling experience has been working with addictions (particularly gambling, alcohol and drugs) where trust is huge and I have also done some specialised training in relationship counselling where I worked with couples too. I have noticed that even if a person was able to stop one behavior, for example, gambling; the same issue would manifest somewhere else, like food, smoking cigarettes, shopping. They can feel that they can’t trust themselves which keeps getting reinforced when they don’t have control and this leads to others not trusting them too. Even more so if the behaviour is causing harm to the other person, either physically, socially or financially too.
Trust is such a deep rooted issue. Like something that is at our very core and deepest part of ourselves so while writing this blog, I wore red as red is the colour of the root chakra which is where our survival instinct is, where many of our inherited family stuff is and much of our survival tendencies. It is located at the root of the spine and as the energy naturally flows up, it is the first chakra and one that holds many of the things that you feel are grounding to you including our basic needs such as food, water, shelter and safety so it is no wonder that this is a very important chakra to discuss when talking about trust. Red is a colour that attracts attention too and usually something that can really motivate us, so hopefully this will motivate you in the area of emotional healing and trust 🙂
I also wore another chakra necklace that I created using the stone Jasper. A beautiful, nurturing stone that is the stone of the root chakra and one that is great to wear when working with emotional trauma.
Read my next post here to learn what you can do to build trust.